Life: spreading

Dear you,

I couldn't think of a good title today so oh well. I'm at kind of a crossroads here. In my baking classes I am realizing more and more that while it's fun it isn't really what I want to do. I've always wanted to decorate cakes. And while people may think that it's all the same, it's really not. Cake decorating is it's own little pocket of baking and pastry as a whole. I think baking is alright, but I don't want to do it as a profession. I want to decorate cakes. Which, in all reality, I don't need to go to college for.

For about a day, I considered dropping out of the baking program I'm in. I haven't paid yet, so now would be the time. I decided against it. I just can't leave it only partially done. It would bother me forever. That being said, once this school year is over I have no idea what to do.

My mom made me look at things from a more mature standpoint. How much money does a cake decorator (that strictly does cakes, nothing else) make? Not much. Barely enough to make it by. So then I kind of resolved I could always do something else and do cakes out of my house for extra money. That idea doesn't bother me in the slightest. It's the actual profession I'd need to pick that's the problem.

I've always loved writing, so that's an option. But the problem with that is I really would only want to do novels. And making your career as a novel writer is just about the stupidest thing you could do. What happens when writer's block hits (and it often does)? You don't make money. And there's also the huge fact that people may just not like what you write. Bad sales=no money. I could go into journalism, but I'm just not as passionate about that. But, I'm leaving it as a possibility.

What I really want to do is Graphic Design. I love piddling around with design-y things on my laptop and I'd love to be better. I think it's fun, and I could be pretty good at it. (I made the Life: Spreading logo. I mean, it's not professional quality, or even close, but it's a start.) Of course, there's a problem with that major too. A few, actually. First, you need to have a portfolio to get into design programs. Since I'm more of an "in the closet" artist I don't have a portfolio. Then there's the fact that it's a booming career choice which means for me to get a job after college doing graphic design I'd need to be pretty darn good. Just like with writing, you can't really know how good you're going to be when you go into the program. But it's a pretty important detail coming out.

After that, I really don't know. I don't have what it takes to enter a lot of different art majors. Either, I'm not talented enough, I didn't do enough in high school, what have you. I'm kind of stuck. I know I would never want to major in most business type degrees. And degrees in things like Philosophy do nothing for you in the real world. Who has a career in philosophy? No one, that's who.

For right now, I'll continue my baking classes and hope that inspiration comes to me. At my mother's wise request, if I don't have a surefire major picked out I won't enroll in college until I do.

Hoping your mind is better made up than mine.

Sincerely, me

P.S. Don't think I'm having an identity crisis or meltdown or anything. I'm fine, and this is what I want to do. I'm still of the mindset that I'm in a great position where I am. And I have my whole life ahead of me to live the life I'm laying the foundation for now. I'm not too worried about picking a major, I think something will come to me. That being said, feel free to throw ideas in!